Every Day I'm Shufflin'

It's the post you've ALL been waiting for... I've started running again! YAY! Praise Jesus! It feels so awesome to be running again. I haven't exercised since February and it's definitely much needed.

I did my first run on Saturday with Kevin. I wanted to run with someone because I had no idea what to expect. I was so nervous that my bra would not hold up, or that I would feel terrible. None of that really happened. I started running... or... more like shuffling along. Hey! It's been awhile, give a girl a break over here! It wasn't too bad. I had to walk a bit, but nothing horrible. I did about 2 1/2 miles of shuffling / jogging (but mostly shuffling).

On one of my breather walks I noticed that my chest felt pretty tight, almost like it was just expanded. Also, my chest felt a bit heavy. I don't know if it was in my mind, but it all felt strange and new. I wonder if it's because of the new placement of my pectoral muscle. Gross!

Thankfully, I haven't felt any tightness or heaviness on my Sunday or Monday runs. I'm still shuffling and jogging along slowly, but it feels so good to just be moving again. I get a little bit of pain in my armpits, but that's to be expected. Otherwise, I feel muscle pain every where I am suppose to when starting up running again. It feels awesome!

- J.

I'm Trapped in a Glass Case of Emotions!

Today was THE day. The day I finally got to wear a normal bra again. I thought the day would be a lot more epic than it was, but I still am very happy with how I felt in a normal bra. Although, I am constantly afraid that I will somehow do damage to the implants. I am worried that the fabric of the bra may be pressing too hard into the implants. I know that this fear is silly, but I can't help thinking that they may pop! What if the bra I am wearing isn't enough support? What if what if what if?!

And of course I am still counting down the days when I can start running again. But as the day of reckoning approaches I am becoming more nervous and less excited. What if I don't find the right sports bra? What if while I am running I am doing some sort of damage to my implants? What if running feels too weird and different now that I have these strange numb blobs on my chest?

It's crazy how my emotions shift back and forth between excitement that my life is going to get back to normal to what if I am getting back to my normal life too soon? Maybe I still need time to heal? AHHH!

I know what you are all thinking... it's just the fear of the unknown! It'll all be OK! Once I get back into my running routine it'll feel like I never left it. 

But first, I'll start with some walking.

- J.