Persistent Cyst

Hey! What did you call me?! Oh, you're not talking to me, you're talking to that little annoying cyst just hanging out on my right ovary. Yeah, that cyst sure is persistent.

I had an ultrasound in October and my gyno saw a cyst on my right ovary. I had a followup ultrasound last month and he said it's still there. Just hanging out. So now I have to go for an MRI so he can "classify" it. It could be anything! And that's a little frightening. It could be a benign ovarian cyst which so many women get throughout their lifetime. It could be endometriosis, which I suspect is throughout my body making my life miserable. And then it could certainly be a cancerous tumor. Ah, life, you sure like to keep me on my toes.

My CA-125 has remained stable throughout all my blood work checks so that gives me some hope that it's not cancerous.  My MRI is scheduled for next week. I'm not super stoked about hanging out in a tube while contrast gets shot in to my body, but what can ya do? I've never gone in head first to an MRI machine, just feet first. Does anyone have any tips / tricks to help me pass the time while I find out if I'm claustrophobic or not? Last MRI I tried to rap along with the loud banging and thumping of the machine, but that only passes a short amount of time. I'll take any suggestions!

- J

Another Cancerversary Down!

Guess what everyone?! It's my 3 year cancerversary!! That's right, 3 years since I was diagnosed and I'm still going strong.

Actually, this day almost passed me by without any notice. I've been busy. Changes are coming as I close up my last week of work and begin a new job on January 20th. I'll never forget my old job though, my coworkers were tremendous as I went through my whole ordeal. I was lucky to be where I was in my life at that moment I was diagnosed. Does that even make sense? But now it's on to bigger and better things!

I still have my worries, my health concerns. My OBGYN is keeping a close eye on my high (but stable) CA-125. A little wrench was thrown into the mix when he told me he saw a cyst on one of my ovaries after an ultrasound in October. I'm going back this month for another CA-125 and ultrasound to check up on everything.

I'd be lying if I didn't admit I am a bit scared. I try to fool myself into thinking that I don't care, that everything is fine, and how unfair it would be if things got any worse than the breat cancer. It would be unfair! But in reality it could happen. Anything can happen. Anything does happen! But thank god I have amazingly capable doctors in my corner. Doctors I trust. They monitor me closely and I trust that if anything should arise they'd be just as capable to take care of me.

It's always been a big scary world out there, but I'm happy to say, that today, I am 3 years cancer free!

- J.

Life's a Game Played by Everyone, and Love is the Prize

While in Michigan for a friend's wedding, I received some pretty awesome news.

I had made up my mind, psyched myself up, that no matter what the results of my CA-125 blood test results turn out to be, it doesn't mean I have ovarian cancer. Either our little birth control diagnostic test will have worked, or the test results will still be high.  If the results are still high, we'll just have to do some more testing. No big deal. Just a new adventure for me. This number was not going to be the final be all, say all, of an ovarian cancer diagnosis.

When my cell phone rang I recognized the number immediately. I took a deep breath and answered the phone. The usual nurse I speak to, Pia, was on the other end. She started the call off with, "I just wanted to call you with some good news!" I think I was holding my breath because I exhaled a great sigh of relief. She told me that my CA-125 count had fallen down to the normal range! I told her how happy and excited I was to hear this news. She said my doctor may want me to take another test in a couple of months, but he didn't specify. He just wanted her to call me immediately. She then wished me a happy upcoming wedding day (he had written down the day in my chart) and we hung up.

Thank god this test was a success! Taking the birth control was worth it! Even though I bled for an entire month, was a bloated, moody mess - it was all worth it! Of course I stopped the birth control immediately after the one month was up. Being on it was such a nightmare. Ugh! But it helped me pass my test, and that's all that matters.


Now I can focus on an entirely different, new path in my life. Marriage! On October 12th, I am getting married and not the tiniest inkling of health concerns will be on my mind. I will start my married life with a clean bill of health, marrying my man who loves me for who I am - fake boobs, scars, and all the rest.

- J.

Vacation and Birth Control

It's been awhile my loyal blog readers and I apologize. You'll forgive me though when you hear what I've been up to. I was on a month long vacation. A real vacation! Not a cancer related one. My vacation consisted of relaxing, the Yuengling brewery, the PA Grand Canyon (yes that exists), wedding planning, and a road trip down to Disney for quite the magical time.

Of course, sprinkled within all these fun activities were a couple of doctor appointments. My first one was my yearly check up with my breast surgeon. She is still very pleased with how everything looks and she said everything felt fine. We discussed future plans and she was a little concerned to hear about my high CA-125 test results.

Ah, yes, the CA-125... I took the second blood test as prescribed by my OBGYN. I had an appointment with him on July 30th. The second test came back higher than the first. Ugh. My first score was a 47 and the second 53. He is concerned because the score went up but he is still convinced it is my endometriosis because my ultrasound came back clean (woo). He wants to do a diagnostic test on me. He wants me to take birth control, take the blood test again, and hope that the test results are lower. The theory is that the birth control will calm everything down.

Now, if you know me I've ademently spoken out against taken birth control. I didn't want a single extra ounce of estrogen in this delicate body of mine. Even when OBGYN after OBGYN recommended birth control for my horrible cramps I always declined. Did they even read the family history section on my chart? I stand by my teenage self and still believe that I made the right decision all these years. But this time things are different. I now need to worry about my ovaries. I no longer have breasts, and ovaries react differently to birth control, so I agreed to take it for diagnostic purposes only. It is also the lowest dose of estrogen and only for a short time.

Well, I don't know how you ladies do it! I started my first pill on the first day of my period as prescribed by my doctor (which was when I was in Disney, heh). Now it's been two weeks and my period hasn't stopped! Ack!! It's much lighter some days but is always there. I also have awful cramps and bloating like crazy. If just a low dose of estrogen does this to me I simply can't! My body is rebelling against me and I don't blame it, I am messing with its carefully crafted hormonal balance. I called my doctor on Friday to make sure these side effects were normal. He said yes and it usually takes three months for your body to become accustomed to it. I told him no way, I don't have three months, I've got an October wedding to plan! I agreed to finish the pack, take the blood test, and hope that it was indeed my endometriosis causing the high results, otherwise we have to find a new diagnostic plan.

Sigh, the trials and tribulations of being a woman.

- J.

Life is a Test and I get Bad Marks

I always did OK in school. My grades were pretty average... A's, B's, C's, whatever. I tried really hard to do well, but sometimes even at my best, I just couldn't get that A. (Or break 1000 in the SATs, but that's another story). Then there are the students who really don't have to study hard or even do homework to get that damn elusive A. I feel like that student in the real life world of my health. Only here, you don't want high marks.

Let me explain, remember when I went for blood work and an ultrasound? Well, I received a call from the doctor's office last month telling me that he wants me to take the CA-125 test over again because, "he thinks it was a false reading." So I cautiously ask, "does that mean the results are high?" The medical assistant responds with, "yes, but the doctor thinks it was a false reading." Ok. I got that. How confident is he with that assessment? I guess we'll see. I am going for blood work this month, so he'll have something to compare the first test to. High marks. Not for the win this time around.

So I did lots of research on the CA-125 via Dr. Google. I know you are surprised by this. I also asked many knowledgeable woman who have first hand experience with the test, and I've come to the conclusion that serial CA-125 tests will be more accurate. Apparently the tests can come back high in pre-menopausal women or just from being a runner. So having a chart of all the tests will be more accurate. My dad forwarded me this recent interesting study done, entitled, "Refining Estimates of Risk for Breast and Ovarian Cancer in BRCA1 and BRCA2 Carriers." I like that low 16% risk I have for Ovarian Cancer, I just hope for once my body doesn't feel like being an overachiever and tries to stick me in that 16%!

I have an appointment with my surgical OBGYN at the end of this month and I will certainly have more to report. For now, can't I just fail at one of life's damn health tests?

- J.