Why I don't read...

Years ago I remember reading a story about a man who was undergoing surgery.  The anesthesiologist put him under but he still had his senses about him.  He could still feel and hear, but his body showed signs of being under.  He could feel the pain and hear what the doctor's were saying.  He finally passed out from all the pain.  When he awoke, no one believed him until he repeated what the doctor's were saying during surgery.

Now, if this story is true or not, I don't know.  But when I read it, I believed it to be 100% true and I thought, this could totally happen to me!  (Even though I had been under anesthesia before with NO problems at all).  So of course, even though I just was under general anesthesia for 5 hours this past February, I am thinking about this story all over again.

WHAT IF IT HAPPENS THIS TIME?!  OMG!!  I should be excited about getting these uncomfortable expanders removed.  And I am.  I've been having trouble sleeping again and I think it's because of them.  (I'm sure it has nothing to do with my irrational fear of anesthesia).  I am excited to get the implants in and see how different they are, and how comfortable they can be (at least they better be or I am going to rage).  I am just super nervous about the general anesthesia.  Though I could use some sleep...

I know what I am really afraid of - the unknown.  But aren't we all?

- J.